Does Glamour = Beauty/Looks?

When I first learned that the August Issue of Sashay Magazine was going to be all about Body Image, I wasn’t sure exactly what I was going to write about. Then the answer came to me after another conversation that I always seem to have right after I am introduced as a writer and they find out that I write columns and articles about living glamorously and am the creator of a whole lifestyle philosophy brand called “Glamour Survival Guides!”. Invariably, as soon as someone learns this, they will say something along the lines of them not looking very glamorous, or that they are not dressed very glamorously. It is almost always an apology to me, of some sort, and I always have to reassure them that, in fact, my goal is to redefine the idea of what it means to “be glamorous” or live “The Glamorous Life”. I feel very strongly about the whole idea of living glamorously not being tied to the way we look, our age, our weight, where we live or the labels on our clothes. And thank goodness! Because I would always feel the need to apologize to them for not living up to their idea of glamorous, either!

This whole idea came to me in, really, an unfortunate way. A few years ago, my husband and I were at a small resort inn celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary. It was a beautiful fall day and we were out enjoying the walking trail on the property. As we were coming around the corner, I was suddenly hit right in the face by a golf ball. In an instant, I was lying face down on the ground unable to comprehend or even realize what was happening. The next thing I knew, my husband and people from all around were standing over me, trying to get me to respond. I really didn’t feel anything, at first. Then I just felt something warm all over my face as they rolled me over. It was blood covering my face so no one could tell where I had been hit, whether it was my eye, nose, or in the mouth. As it was, I was really lucky, I got hit on the brow bone just a hair above my right eye. The emergency room doctor told me that a hair in any direction and I would be blind, or a shattered nose or cheekbones, or my teeth knocked out or actually dead. Needless to say, the pain was terrible! But I felt great relief at the news of how fortunate I was.

We called our parents, who were watching our kids and told them what had happened and that we would be coming home early and to prepare the kids for how I looked, because I looked really scary! It had split open my brow bone through all the layers of the skin down to the bone. I had layers of stitches and was of course, black, blue, green, purple and swollen huge! My daughter was afraid to look at me. We had no way of knowing exactly what I would look like until all the swelling and bruising was gone, and the stitches were removed. It would be months before we knew how much, if any, plastic surgery would be needed. It was during this period, obviously, that I had plenty of time to reflect on just how important one’s looks are in your life. I wasn’t sure what I would look like, and I have to admit, that I was a little scared. I knew that I would still be the same person inside, no matter how I looked, but I obviously worried what people would think or how they might react, or even how I would feel if I would always look different after the incident. Having been a model for several years, I knew how much attention was focused on one’s looks and I also knew how tiring, boring and unfortunate that was. That one’s looks had absolutely nothing to do with what kind of person someone was. I am glad to say, and very thankful, that I healed back to looking just like I did before, (for better or for worse!), and that I didn’t even need any plastic surgery. The emergency room doctor was amazing! He did beautiful work on my all the layers of my stitches. I do remember him saying, after the brain scans, that I have proof that I am perfectly normal. (My husband says he said there was nothing there-jokingly, of course!) All I have is a scar through my right eyebrow, and you can only tell it’s there if you know to look for it. 

I always remember that time as the time I really came to appreciate that the person inside is the only one that matters and that living with the people that love you and that you love, and having the joy to embrace each beautiful day, and the gift to enjoy laughter are the ingredients for living a glamorous life. And that the image we see of ourselves will always reflect back to us in the form of our relationships with others. So whenever we meet and you find out that I write about living the glamorous life, neither one of us will feel the need to apologize to each other for the way we look. We will know we are living “The Glamorous Life” because we are embracing the joy of living!

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